Smooth Pick Up Lines - Ladies Retort
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Smooth Editor Chosen Pick Up Lines

• I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher: have you seen one?
  
  
• I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on earth tonight.
  
  
• Want to play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me.
  
  
• I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Superdrug, so I could ride you all day long for a quarter.
  
  
• Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag.
  
  
• I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked.
  
  
• Is that a ladder in your stockings or the stairway to heaven?
  
  
• You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
  
  
• Yo Babybee cakes, Are those real?
  
  
• You must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy.
  
  
• I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue.
  
  
• If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.
  
  
• (Look down at your crotch) Well It's not just going to suck itself.
  
  
• You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.
  
  
• You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions?
  
  
• Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.
  
  
• F@# me if I'm wrong, but is your name Sherry Titsbottom?
  
  
• Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.
  
  
• My name is (name)...remember that, you'll be screaming it later.
  
  
• Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?
  
  
• Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.
  
  
• My friend wants to know if YOU think I'M cute.
  
  
• Hi. The voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.
  
  
• My name isn't Elmo, but you can tickle me anytime you want to.
  
  
• I know milk does a body good, but DAMN, how much have you been drinking?
  
  
• If you were the last woman and I was the last man on earth, I bet we could do it in public.
  
  
• Wanna come over for some pizza and sex? No? Why? Don't you like pizza?
  
  
• Baby, I'm an American Express lover...you shouldn't go home without me.
  
  
• Do you sleep on your stomach? Can I???
  
  
• Do you wash your pants in Windex? Because I can see myself in them.
  
  
• I lost my puppy. Can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.
  
  
• (Lick finger and wipe on her shirt) Let's get you out of these wet clothes.
  

Snappy female comebacks to guy's cheesy pick ups lines

• Man:"Haven't we met before?"
  Woman: "Perhaps. I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."
  
  
• Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?
  Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."
  
  
• Man: "Is this seat empty?"
  Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."
  
  
• Man: "So, wanna go back to my place ?"
  Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"
  
  
• Man: "Your place or mine?"
  Woman: "Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."
  
  
• Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
  Woman: "It's in the phone book.">
  
  
• Man: "But I don't know your name."
  Woman: "That's in the phone book too."
  
  
• Man: "So what do you do for a living?"
  Woman: "I'm a female impersonator."
  
  
• Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"
  Woman: "Do not Enter"
  
  
• Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"
  Woman: "Unfertilized !"
  
  
• Man:"I know how to please a woman."
  Woman: "Then please leave me alone."
  
  
• Man: "I want to give myself to you."
  Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."
  
  
• Man:"If I could see you naked, I'd die happy:
  Woman: "Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing".
  
  
• Man:"Your body is like a temple."
  Woman: "Sorry, there are no services today."
  
  
• Man:"I'd go through anything for you."
  Woman: "Good! Let's start with your bank account."
  
  
• Man:"I would go to the end of the world for you.
  Woman: "Yes, but would you stay there?